


Alone, But Never Again

by Garpie64



Series: Omega Jason Todd Week 2020 [6]
Category: Batman - All Media Types, Red Hood and the Outlaws (Comics)
Genre: Abandonment, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alpha/Omega, Angst, Break Up, Emotional Hurt, Fights, Hurt No Comfort, M/M, Mpreg, No Fluff, Omega Jason Todd, Soul Bond, do not copy to other site
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-12
Updated: 2020-04-12
Packaged: 2021-03-01 22:40:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,243
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23614642
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Garpie64/pseuds/Garpie64
Summary: Soul bonds are vital to keeping a soul healthy. For an omega, it was a case of life or death. Omegas who never taste a soul bond rarely live through their teens.Somehow, Jason's gone all his life without one and he can only thank the pit for that, but now the Lazarus Pit alone can't keep him alive and Dick, the ever self-sacrificing hero, is done with him.
Relationships: Batfamily Members & Jason Todd, Dick Grayson/Jason Todd
Series: Omega Jason Todd Week 2020 [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1691851
Comments: 101
Kudos: 380
Collections: omega Jason Todd week 2020





	Alone, But Never Again

**Author's Note:**

> Omega Jason Todd Week ~ Day 7: Free Day
> 
> ~~There was a vote for fluff or angst and angst won~~

Jason was frozen. The shock had rolled down through his body leaving him numb and cold. He didn't really know why he was surprised. He shouldn't be. He knew this day was coming and yet he still wasn't prepared to hear those words or that biting tone from the golden boy. Dick stood there glaring with ocean blue eyes that had never really softened for him. 

Not when he was a depressed lonely kid desperate for some form of affection.

Not when he attempted to right the wrongs he did under the influence of a magic pit and a madwoman.

Not when he was on his back spreading his legs and submitting like a good omega.

He had seen this coming. There was a silent clock counting down the days until Dick finally let out all that he was keeping locked up inside. Their relationship would never work. It had been doomed from the start. There was too much hatred, too much pain, too much bloody history between them. Jason never imagined it would end up hurting this much. He could feel the tentative and shaky bond between them shatter. It had been weak, barely there and just a flicker. Now he felt it crumbling away again leaving Jason isolated, alone, without a single person. 

Again.

When the Pit madness left him floundering in a world that did not want him, he had vowed to never allow another living soul in. Impenetrable walls were crafted to protect what little still lingered of his heart. And yet when the test results came in the fear drove him to violate his promise. Fear had driven him. Jason had tasted death once, he didn’t want to taste it again so soon. The doctors had pushed surrogate packs in an attempt to make emergency bonds to prevent further degradation of his soul, but at the time he didn’t believe that was a valid option. The Red Hood had enemies, many dangerous enemies. A normal pack would be in too much danger.

No matter how much Jason’s body need the touch of other souls, paranoia fueled by a tragic life destroyed any bond with a stranger. Life taught that no one could be trusted; not strangers, not friends, and not family. 

But, Dick had been changing that. Jason had been trying to better himself and Dick had been the reason. The alpha had given Jason hope that one day he might actually feel a real pack bond, might be accepted for who he was. The Bats seemed to have been less suspicious and angry around him. He had spent more time around the Manor, getting to know Tim and Damian and trying to appease the Wayne pack. He even managed a civil conversation with Bruce. For the first time since he was a street rat brought into the Wayne Manor, he had hope.

And just like that, it was ripped away from him in the cruelest manner.

Dick snarled angrily. “Say something! Don't just stand there like a fucking statue.”

“What do you want me to say, Dick?” Jason's voice was calm, low, hiding the pain in his chest.

Dick threw up his hands in exasperation. “I don't know why I bother with you. You never change! You're still that murderous psychopath that cut his way through Gotham. Why the hell did I bother? Oh, I know. Because Tim let it slip that you were dying. Why the fuck did I volunteer for this?”

Jason's fingers curled into fists as he bit his cheek to keep the tears at bay. He couldn't survive with these emotions. He had to resort to anger. He could handle it so much better. It was the only thing he could ever rely on. “I'm so sorry fucking me was such a goddamn hassle for you! If you all fucking hate me so fucking much, why the hell didn't you just leave me alone to die? At least then you wouldn't have to worry about the black sheep. Red Hood would be gone and then you could go back to the fake little image you have of Jason Todd the cautionary tale!”

“You're unbelievable!” Dick roared over him. “You're given so many fucking chances and yet you still just throw them away! Bruce should have never made you Robin. He should have thrown you in jail where you belonged!”

Jason laughed. “You're really still not over that are you? You don't fucking get it!”

“What don't I get?!”

“He never wanted me! He wanted you but you were off doing your own thing! I was just a poor fucking substitute. You really think I didn't know exactly what I meant to all of you?”

“Oh don't give me that shit about not being loved.”

“It's not bullshit! If I had meant pack to Bruce I would have a pack bond to him, but I didn't! I was nothing to him but Robin! A fucking tool trying to be you! I'm the only one he tried to mold into a carbon copy of you!”

“How could anyone get near you when you were a little monster! You pushed everyone away.”

“After the hell I lived, it's kind of expected to have trust issues, Dick.” Jason snapped. “And how else was I suppose to react? No one gave a shit about me before Bruce and we all know how badly he handles emotions. I never had the loving parents you had. I never got the support system you had. I only ever saw Bruce’s disappointment, your hatred, and everyone else’s rejection. Tell me, please tell me, how the fuck a traumatized kid who only knew abuse and neglect magically forget all of it to be exactly what everyone else want.”

“You're not the only one with issues.” Dick growled.

“I never said I was!” Jason answered. “I'm just the only one no one ever wants to help. If it had been up to the rest of you Bruce would have left me to rot in Crime Alley. I didn't try to steal his tires because it would get me a reputation! I was desperate and starving and part of me wondered what he would do.”

“You never understood Bruce's morals! He'd never cross that line! And you can't expect him to do it for you.” Dick growled.

Jason clenched his fist. He could feel the Pit in the back of his skull whispering the words he knew would hurt Dick. It amplified his own pain making his cracking soul hurt worse and all while slowing down his destruction. He needed to leave before the Pit took full control. He had managed to get it under control the past few years, but he'll never be free of it. 

“I'm done with you.” Dick turned away grabbing his keys and heading for the door, making the decision for Jason. “Have a nice fucking life.”

Jason hated that he jumped when the door slammed shut. He stood there in silence while his ears kept ringing. He felt the Pit slip away back to the dark corner he had stuffed it into. The anger fell away to leave him hollow and empty. He stumbled back until he hit the wall before collapsing to the floor. Tears fell down uncontrollably as he shrank into himself. Knees to his chest face buried in his arms, he sat there in his empty apartment in the dark and sobbed. 

The bond snapped and the pain was nearly overwhelming, but Jason had lived with this pain all his life. No one had ever created a pack bond with him before. No one had wanted anything to do with him. The doctors had been so surprised when they learned that his soul held no traces of any bonds. Omegas needed them to survive. None lived to his age without one.

Jason had guessed the Pit was the only reason he had made it this far. He wiped his face with the sleeve of his shirt before laying a hand against his stomach.

“Sorry little guy, looks like daddy doesn't want anything to do with us, huh?” Jason cracked a broken smile. He let himself wallow in the agony a little longer before he pushed himself up to start packing.

The Bats would probably be on his ass soon. None of them would stand any threat to the golden boy. Jason had been deemed worthless. It was only a matter of time before the pack descended upon him. Before they could, Jason was getting out of Gotham. He wasn’t coming back. There were enough traumatized children running around in costumes. No one would miss the family black sheep.

It was a quick job clearing out the apartment. Living as a ghost meant collecting very little personal belongings. There were a few other safe houses dotted around the city. The Bats could deal with those. With everything packed into a bag, he left the apartment and everything else behind. He always kept at least one run down unassuming truck available for if and when he might need to go on the run. He cleaned out and now it was time to get the hell out of the city. The radio was cranked up to a deafening level and the wayward bird finally cut his strings.

Many had accused him of running from his problems. Willis, Catherine, Bruce, Talia, they all chastised him for it. Instincts were hard to fight when they were all that kept him alive for years. It kept him alive on the streets. He had it down to an art, but still the thought lingered of how long he could run before he finally bit the bullet. 

A brief thought flickered through as he wondered if Dick ever found that gun hidden away in a safe beneath Jason’s bed so well cared for and loaded with a single bullet.

Jason’s fingers tightened on the steering wheel. He had given everything to people who kept taking and taking. He endured; tried to be what was wanted. He gave Dick the last part of him he could, that tiny sliver of undamaged soul that Dick took greedily and ground into dust before his eyes. Dick took everything he had left and by mistake gave him something in return. The tiny tickle he felt in his soul gave him a tiny horribly wonderful bit of hope. 

Jason wouldn’t tell Dick. He’ll never let the alpha know the spark of life inside him. HE would do everything in his power to ensure his child lived a normal happy life even if he had to struggle on his own with society looking down on him. Bruce would turn his child into another soldier, another martyr for his cause.

Jason would die before he let that happen.

~ * ~

Dick stood in the living room looking down at a picture of him and his siblings. It had been a rare time where everyone were together and getting along. Even Jason had been content to play along. Dick's eyes were caught on the omega's face. He was smiling wrapped in Dick’s arms, but it was fake, pretend. How had none of them realized it? Dick set the picture back down on the end-table and looked around the silent apartment. It was stale and didn't look like there had been anyone living in it for a month or more. 

None of Jason's things were here. He kept very few things as Dick had come to learn. He lived as if he was constantly on the run. jumping from place to place. It wasn't a good existence for an o+mega. They needed to have a den where they could live and relax, but Jason never settled in one place for very long. Of course, he had decided to finally settle in this apartment when they started whatever the thing between them had been. Now it looked like Jason had never been here.

There wasn't even a stash for weapons or gear. It looked like an average apartment with no personal affects. He remembers the call from Barbara about Jason being missing, of his old safe houses being empty and abandoned. He hadn’t thought anything of it. It wasn’t unusual for the omega to go silent for a week or two, but then a month passed and the criminal underground erupted, becoming a living hell with new and old players warring for power. None of the Bats ever realized how much the Red Hood kept the Gotham crime scene under control. It was an all hands on deck kind of situation to get Gotham somewhat under control. 

It’s been three months since Jason disappeared and they were just now getting everything back under control. Jason had yet to reappear. Dick didn't put much stock in Jason ever returning even if Bruce did find where the omega had gone. He had felt the snap of their fragile bond that night. Knew that when Jason didn't show up after the gang wars that he had left Gotham and the Bats. 

With a sigh, Dick turned to leave the apartment. Nightwing slipped out onto the roof to begin patrol and try to keep peace and order in the wake of the backlash of Jason's disappearance. He could hear the Bats chattering through the com focused on suppressing a potential gang war between two gangs Hood had kept a treaty of peace between. He rushed off to join them.

**Author's Note:**

> Find me on [Tumblr](https://garpie64.tumblr.com/)


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